i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
there is glitter all over my balls
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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