Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize