covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
