I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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