After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
