Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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