how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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