I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
