then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
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I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
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Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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