I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
