At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
