That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
