well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize