So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
