so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
