Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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