break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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