This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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