Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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