remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
