Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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