The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize