The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
