saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
