The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
this is an emotional support booty call
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
