i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
