return my video game
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
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