The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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