Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
