The beer is more important than you right now.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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