we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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