Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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