So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
