do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
