We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize