if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
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