I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
