I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.