I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.