I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
