Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
