her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
i jhust puked up my retainher.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
me + whiskey = a bad person
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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