So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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