I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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