We're facebook friends in real life
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize