2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
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