so explain again why im purple
no
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
