your room smells of hookers.
And success
Who wears a wallet chain?!
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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