The maid of honor just puked.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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