Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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