apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
