super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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