We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
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